Happy Birthday, Mr. Resident

IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!!  WOOOOOOO!!!  This means celebration!…within reason; I still have a job these joyous days.

That being said, things at work have been rather calm these last few days.  I didn’t receive any new clients last week, my soonest trial is next month, and my imprisoned clients are up to date on their cases.  Because things were going smoothly, I figured that I was free enough to head down to Salem to see Cthulhu (my partner, not the Great Old One).  On Friday, I got off work early and drove on down for 2–3 hours.  What made this trip special was that the entire Portland area was consumed by a massive thunderstorm, making travel a unique challenge.  Here, “unique challenge” means that my vision was obscured even with my wipers on max setting and trees were falling down onto the road—at one point, I even drove over part of a downed tree!  Miraculously, the Benmobile didn’t seem to suffer any significant damage; even more miraculously, I made it to Salem in one piece.  I kept myself sane by staying focused on the destination and singing along with songs on the radio (appropriately enough, “Sweet but Psycho” by Ava Max was playing when the storm was at its craziest).

Down in Salem, it was wonderful to be in Cthulhu’s warm embrace and to not be thinking constantly about domestic violence and/or substance abuse.  I played Pokémon Shield, ate peppermint bark, and enjoyed the sights and cuisine from Salem that I missed.  I even managed to arrange a small get-together as an impromptu early birthday celebration.  When all was done, it was time for me to head back on Sunday; the forestry state workers had done their jobs right, and there was virtually no debris on my 2–3-hour trip home.  The weather was still rainy, but I wasn’t scared for my safety this time—progress!

Finally, it was the day of my birthday.  I had originally hoped to take most of the day off, but the wheels of justice grind on regardless of commemorations of birth; I had to handle a case management and cover in-custody arraignments (my specialty).  Still, I managed to take it relatively easy between my main events, reviewing reports and setting up office appointments from the comfort of my office.  I even managed to finish up earlier than usual: at 4:50pm (I know, I’m such a rebel)!  This meant I could finally go home, rest up, and appreciate some birthday bliss…before the crushing realization that I’m now 27 set in.  Wheeee!!!  In all seriousness, I felt this was a great day, even if it was busier than most birthdays.

It may not be a cake, but I've figured out how to celebrate birthdays just fine Tillamook-style.

One additional odd thing of note: at my impromptu birthday celebration, I received two coin banks.  After some consideration, I decided to put my new Batman coin bank in my office.  Batman may not necessarily fit the image of a law office, but it fits better than the alternative…

 

Batman, who now stares down at visiting clients and holds my change.

The alternative, which I have elected to leave on the main table in my living space.

I don’t feel like writing anymore, so I’ll close this entry with another installment of…

GREAT MOMENTS IN TILLAMOOK JURISPRUDENCE

*insert sophisticated music*

Episode IV: To Chambers in a Handbasket

Benjamin D. Fischberg, Attorney at Law: [going through motions of arraignment] We acknowledge receipt of this charging instrument.  We waive formal reading of the charges and advice of rights but reserve the right to challenge the charging instrument at a later date.

Judge: Very well.  Based on the charges, bail is set at $30,000.  You can post 10% of that to be released.  We’ll set your next hearing for next week.  Sir, please keep in contact with your attorney…

Defendant: [interrupting] Yeah whatever, you’re not a real judge.  Go to hell!

[note: the judge in this case is in fact a real judge]

J: [calmly but firmly] Keep in contact with your attorney, sir!  We’ll see you next week.  Deputy, please take him away.

[Defendant is miraculously not charged with contempt of court.  I have to struggle a little to hold in my gasps/laughter.]