Leisure Suit Lawyer

 

In all the hurly-burly of day-to-day life, I recently reached an inconspicuous milestone.  As of this month (October 2024, for those looking back), I have now been a licensed lawyer for 5 years.  While there are certain charms and perks to this job (flexible hours on some weeks, civic pride, and decent pay), being an attorney is a lot of work that can wear you down if you’re not careful.  To properly balance out my life, I spent most of the summer (and am spending the ongoing fall) with a simple quest: try to enjoy myself more by taking full advantage of what free time I have.  Benjamin D. Fischberg, Attorney at Law has his needs met (and I can’t discuss the particulars of his work); it was time to reconnect with Ben Fischberg, the gamer, cosplayer, and opportunistic adventurer.

One adventure that I took full advantage of was Canterbury Faire in late July.  I haven’t been to a renaissance fair in five years; the last one I went to was right before being sworn in as a lawyer.  As such, it was a grand time I spent with friends enjoying the atmosphere in my festive purple velvet robe and perusing the wares of various artisans (when not watching a mother***ing joust tournament).  In the process, I scored a parasol that I’ve been making good use of throughout the summer, along with some fudge and raspberry cordial that I did my best to make last (*burp*).  I didn’t take a lot of pictures (taking photos usually feels out of place), but enjoy these majestic mechanical dragons I found.

 

On a more day-to-day basis, a lot of leisure has been dedicated to video games.  I’ve spent the summer and early autumn dipping my toes into various games old and new—Animal Crossing: New Horizons, The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages, Hades, and the Battlefront series, to name a few.  However, one game that has been taking a notable amount of time is Star Wars: Bounty Hunter.  This solid licensed third-person shooter was a major staple of my childhood, helped turn me into a serious gamer, and is indirectly the reason I became a lawyer (it’s a long story—I’ll probably get into my origin story in a later blog post).  It’s been a blast to catch up with the newly remastered Switch port, which has slightly better graphics, better lighting, and multiple control options.  Caught up in the glow of nostalgia, I’ve been spending my evenings zooming around on jetpacks and gunning down criminals.  As you can see, I’ve been hunting down the worst of the worst: gangsters, drug runners, animal abusers, graffiti artists, art critics, and people who don’t flush public toilets:

 

 

 

All my shooting and hunting paid off, as I accomplished something that had seemed far out of reach for the past 2 decades: I achieved 100% completion in Bounty Hunter!  Catching every secondary bounty (alive when wanted) was no small feat, but I managed to do it in less than 2 months since buying the remastered port.  I don’t know how I stack up as a gamer in the big picture, but 10-year-old me is impressed and proud of 31-year-old me.

(I also achieved 100% completion on Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door,  which is no less impressive, this summer.  I’ve been on a roll!)

As summer started to wind down, I geared up for another big adventure: Rose City Comic Con!  After a long trial early in September (where 5 hours of jury deliberations kept me in court until 10pm :P), I put on my Pokémon trainer costume from last con and met up with my buddy Carson (who was a great sport and helped me take loads of pictures) for 3 days of cosplay, perusing art, photo ops, and overall goofiness.  Having gone 6 years without any conventions, it feels great to have gone to 2 cons in a single year.  Even though there are still 2 months left in 2024, I’m looking forward to whatever cons I can make it to in 2025 (I’ve already looked into 4 so far).  For now, here’s (some of) the highlights of Rose City Comic Con 2024 in photographic form:

I got plans for this prop pistol...

me and Carson :)

The inevitable result of my wacky antics (fortunately, I know a competent attorney in the area).

A quick portrait I commissioned.

 

Someone was selling anime body pillows of General Grievous and Manfred von Karma.  I bought these $10 keychain versions, as I certainly wasn't shelling out $50 for full-size pillows...yet.

At the tail end of summer, I enjoyed a slightly lower-key adventure with Cthulhu with Salem’s Pride in the Park.  Given that Pride events are usually kept to June, having a second helping in September is an excellent treat for Salem residents (or weekend visitors, in my case).  The event got crashed by some homophobic @$$hole protesters, but we had an awesome time on a beautiful day.  There weren’t too many photo ops, but I stepped a little out of my comfort zone and got my hair temporarily dyed purple:

 

All in all, I’ve been doing my best to enjoy my free time; aside from these main adventures covered here, I’ve been trying other little tricks and hobbies.  I’ve been working on future cosplays one day of a time (in preparation for the aforementioned ~4+ future cons), I’ve been extending Rosh Hashana by enjoying apples with honey for dessert (also a great way to get rid of excess caramel sauce), and I’ve been pushing myself into picking up old hobbies (such as Lego and mixing rum with things—more on that another time).  Moreover, I’ve been preparing the blog entry that you are currently reading as a reminder to myself that fun is out there and that working hard doesn’t mean I can’t play hard.  As we go into Halloween and the holiday season, I look forward to finding out how else I can fill the time between court hearings in my 6th year as an apprentice attorney.

Pride Along 3: Purrrrr-fect Summer

It’s been two months since my last blog post.  As is frequently the case, the most interesting things I’ve been involved with are confidential and/or unsuitable for blogging (or are related to video games and would likely be seen as uninteresting by the public).  Still, the last two months have had several things of note that I can write a fair bit about.  So, as we head into summer, here’s the roundup.

The most notable development career-wise is that my caseload has been getting considerably lighter.  A lot of cases (particularly gnarly ones with difficult fact patterns) have been getting dismissed or resolved.  Thanks to this un-troubling trend, my summer is looking relatively free this year.  Only time will tell if this continues to last.  One thing is clear: outside of a recent low career point (I burst out laughing in court and had to cover it up with some coughing), I’ve definitely got the hang of this lawyer business!...for now, at least.

One place I’ve found myself surprisingly busy is Salem, Oregon during my visits with Cthulhu.  Like many places in America, Salem has a population of stray cats.  Unlike many places in America, Salem has Cthulhu, who recently helped trap, and is helping to take care of, two litters of kittens (complete with their mothers).  There’s the Squash Litter (being hosted by a neighbor and fed by Cthulhu), all named after squashes, and the Spice Kittens (currently in Cthulhu’s house), all named after different spices.  Whenever I’m in town, I help Cthulhu with feeding, looking after, and occasionally administering medical treatment to both litters.  It can sometimes be a stressful handful, but taking care of kittens is something that makes me feel warm and fuzzy on weekends, making a good contrast to my usual work as a lawyer.  I don’t know for certain how long I’ll be helping to take care of the kittens, but I intend to be involved in helping them until both litters are properly spayed and adopted.  In the meantime, here are a few pictures of Cthulhu’s recent charges (though not all of them):

 

Acorn, of the Squash Litter, who loves climbing

Lumina, of the Squash Litter, who is very smol

Pumpkin of the Squash Litter

Zucchini, of the Squash Litter, who is a little purr machine

Buttercup, of the Squash Litter, who is very food-motivated

Little Zucchini on the prowl

Zucchini REALLY likes being held and petted

Cardamom, the mother of the Spice Kittens

Tumeric, of the Spice Kittens, who is constantly cuddling into a loaf

Paprika of the Spice Kittens

Cinnamon, of the Spice Kittens, who is in the process of being adopted

Ginger, of the Spice Kittens, who is being adopted along with Cinnamon

One thing that I feel deserves mentioning here is a little bit of history that passed me by.  On May 30, 2024, Donald Trump (who I’ve mentioned a few times) became the first former President of the United States to be convicted of a crime (thirty-four counts of felony falsification of business records, to be exact).  There’s honestly a lot I could write here about politics, the nature of this case, and the wider social context of the various reactions to it, but this blog isn’t really the right forum for that; I’ll leave the political and philosophical discourse to analysts and pundits.  What does bear writing here is that I’ll certainly remember how this historic moment got down: I was about to start remote in-custody video arraignments on a slow day when I got a news alert that a verdict had been reached in the case.  I knew that the trial was winding down, but I expected several more days of deliberations at that point.  In some ways, it felt familiar; I’ve been through enough trials (as a lawyer, thankfully) that I’m used to the energy in a room when a clerk says, “we have a verdict,” and the jury re-enters and delivers the verdict.  What wasn’t familiar to me was being an outsider constantly checking news sites for updates on each verdict, and then realizing that I just sat through something historic.  I was able to finish video arraignments with a blank face and no complications, but I’ll always remember where I was and what it was like when Donald Trump was convicted, and a normally slow day became very memorable.

The final thing of note (which helped provide today’s title) was that there was an annual Pride block party in Salem this month that I took the time to enjoy with Cthulhu.  It ended up being unusually intense (there were some bigoted @$$hole protesters surrounding the block, resulting in various counterprotests and a massive police presence—thankfully, there was no violence), but it was a nice day on the town featuring ice cream, colorful fashion, ridiculously sweet lemonade, cool musical performances, and an appearance from Salem’s most beloved celebrity, Cesar the No-Drama Llama!

 

So, to recap: light work, kittens, historic conviction, and Pride with a llama.  Not a bad way to start the summer!

A Conventional Vacation

Aloha, readers!  It’s been about two weeks since I came back from Hawaii.  Work’s been picking up, but I’ve got enough slow days coming up to catch up.  Better yet, I’m nice and recharged after two weeks in paradise.

While I was in Hawaii, I made sure to do most of the things I usually do when on-island.  I caught up with friends where I could while playing video games and going on shopping sprees.  During one such rendezvous with friends, I embarked on my first ever escape room challenge!  It was a thrill working together against the clock, and I look forward to trying more such challenges in the future.  Whenever the weather allowed it, I went swimming by pool and by beach.  As someone with limited pool accessibility (there’s a pool at the local Y, but I haven’t had the time/courage to check it out), swimming is an experience I always treasure on vacation.  Kailua Beach is also world-renowned for its beauty, so hitting that beach is always the highlight of vacation.  On most days, I took it easy the best ways I knew how: playing video games, enjoying Mom’s cooking, sleeping, not thinking about work, reading manga, and watching Cthulhu (who traveled with me and deserves a medal for dealing with my stressed-out @$$ at the airport) shoot Nazi testicles in Sniper Elite 5.

As fun as everything was on vacation, the grandest time of all was the main event: Kawaii Kon, Hawaii’s annual massive anime/gaming convention.  I had been to Kawaii Kon before, and I used to be quite the convention-goer, but I haven’t been to any cons since COVID-19 shook up the world.  Obviously, massive gatherings of people were not ideal when there was a deadly global pandemic; to be honest, I had been hesitant to return to cons even as the pandemic was winding down.  Now, having been vaccinated multiple times and survived the virus itself, I finally felt confident enough to re-ignite my social life and spend some time with fellow pop culture-enthusiasts.  Cosplaying as a protagonist from Pokémon Violet, I hit the scene with some friends and had a blast.  I know what you’re thinking: “pics or it didn’t happen!”  Well, my skeptical reader, enjoy!

It was great to be back in Hawaii and equally great to be back in the convention game.  I don’t know how many cons I’ll go to in the foreseeable future (I’ll need to watch the country’s continued infection rates…and my pocketbook), but I certainly look forward to the next one I attend.  Similarly, I look forward to the next time I go to Hawaii, whenever that may be.  For now, I must continue my life’s work in Tillamook: representing clients by daylight and conquering video games by moonlight!